The Year of Our Lord, AD 2017 ~ In Retrospect

"I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill;
but time and chance happeneth to them all."
Ecclesiastes 9:11

(KJV)

As I contemplated the process of closing out yet another year of life,

I began to think of it as AD 2017, and I delved into the meaning of "AD".

This abbreviated term is often misinterpreted as "After Death" of Jesus Christ,

but, in actuality, "AD" means "anno Domini" and the full phrase translates,

"in the year of our Lord Jesus Christ".

Source

I'll be honest.

2017 has been really hard.

Beyond difficult.

I think it is safe to say that the amount of worry I have carried and the tears I have cried this year 

far surpass a lot of other years of living combined.

It started on January 1st...the very first day of this year, 

when my niece, Kristen, who was expecting her first child, collapsed in the Emergency Room,

only to find out that she had a blood clot in her lung.

What followed was an intense urgency placed upon my heart to personally pray her and her unborn baby through the pregnancy and delivery.

It was something that I could not shake off or dismiss, because Kristen is, and always has been, 

very near and dear to my heart.

Though I knew I had no control over any part of the outcome of her ordeal,

I was bound and determined to do all I could to move God on His throne on behalf of her and her unborn baby boy, often asking you, dear friends, to join with me in fervent prayer.

(Which, by the way, you were ever so faithful to do, and I am eternally grateful for you.)
The outcome God permitted was a definite response to the many prayers prayed.
More about the little miracle guy and pictures later.😃

During the time of Kristen's trials, several other extenuating circumstances began to arise,

that required more of me than I felt I could even begin to give.

Time after time, I have been forced way past what I thought were my "limits".

God stretched me in so many ways this year, I realized my "limits" were just points the flesh part of me never wanted to have to go past or deal with.

As much as I did not want to walk past those points, God had other plans, 

and each time He forced me forward into places I did not want to go, it became evident that I was not walking at all, but being carried by arms that refuse to let go.

I know it sounds insane, but the only way I know to describe the way I have felt, at times this year, is that it was like I was having an out of body experience.

It was almost like it wasn't even me....going through the motions, stumbling along, doing what was required on automatic pilot, completely numb and void of feeling.

We end this year much different than we started.

Kevin no longer has an earthly father.

It is a hard thing to watch the effects and depths of his grieving this first Christmas/holiday season without his Dad.
His Mom's struggles remain and loom enormous after a horrific car wreck, in which she totally lost control, hit a rock wall, fractured her neck, and mangled her right arm.
Aunt Vaida's lung cancer is back, and she continues to fight this awful disease.

All three of my dear sisters stand in the face of severe testing...
one, still reeling in the aftermath and ongoing chaos from her home's direct hit from Hurricane Irma,

one, whose whole world was turned completely upside down when her husband, LD, passed away just four days ago...none of us can believe he is gone...the grief is so raw and near-unbearable,

and, one, who continues to suffer from complications after surgery this year.
My cousin, Danny, and his wife, Vickie, both died within eight hours of each other.
Another cousin, Billy, lost his only son, Chris, during 2017.
Our dear, precious family dog, Paige, passed away after suffering terribly.
We will never, ever forget her.

There are a host of other personal things...things that have shaken us to the core and come close to knocking us off our feet this year.
Our future feels very shaky and uncertain heading into 2018.
Things we counted on to be there, can be counted on no longer.
So many chapters closed...so many heartaches and changes...seeming to come from so many angles.

Someone said it is a compliment when God allows extreme anguish.

That satan fights hardest against those he considers a threat.

That God entrusts hard things to those He can trust the most.

I'll be honest.

None of this feels like a compliment.

It feels like way too much at one time.

More than once, I have said, "I can't take anymore".

More than once, God has proven that when I can't go another step, He is strong enough to pick me up and carry me...issues, hang-ups, burdens, included.

I started this post talking about this being AD 2017, the year of our Lord Jesus Christ.

As we wrap up this beyond-difficult year, the point God is trying to get across to me is that
the year 2017, along with every other year of life, was His...to do with as He chose.
To order, direct, orchestrate, and allow every detail, according to a plan that is so far above anything I can comprehend.

The moments, hours, days, months, and years are His.

Psalm 31:15 says, 

"My times are in Thy hand: deliver me from the hand of mine enemies, and from them that persecute me."

It is not for me to dictate when and how things occur in this life.

I have NO control over anything at all.

There is a "fullness of time" for every event that happens to each and every one of us.

"That in the dispensation of the fullness of times He might gather together in one all things in Christ, both which are in heaven, and which are on earth; even in Him..."
Ephesians 1:10

"But when the fullness of the time was come, God sent forth His Son, made of a woman, made under the law..."
Galatians 4:4

We can't rush, nor delay the things that God reserves unto Himself.

If I had my way, none of my loved ones would ever suffer, and I would never be separated from any of them through death.

They would all live to a ripe, old age, in well, healthy bodies, and I would spend every possible moment with them.

Accidents would never happen.
Phone calls that bear bad, shocking, shake-you-to-the-core news would never occur.

All would be well.

Always.

I don't always get my way.

That is a fact of this life, and the sooner I accept it, the easier it will be to navigate through all of the things that are "not my will".

We live in a fallen world, so far inferior to the home Jesus has gone to prepare for us.
As long as we are here, there will be many things to endure.

Jesus said,
"These things I have spoken unto you, that in Me ye might have peace. 
In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world."
John 16:33

None of us are exempt from the human condition.

"That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for He maketh His sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust."
Matthew 5:45

At the end of this year, our hearts are broken shattered.
LD's passing left my family and me completely stunned, and my tears flow like a river.
We all had so much faith for his earthly, physical healing, and when it didn't happen the way we wanted it to, we are left reeling from the shock.
I'm not even going to pretend that I come close to understanding why God took LD right now.
We will miss him forever, and the hurt is going to linger for a long, long time.
He was such a strong, necessary part of our family, and there is just this big, deep void now.
There are no words.

As we mourn and pass through this season of enormous grief,
there is a bright spot that illuminates all of our hearts and souls.
His name is Eli, and, as promised, here is a picture of the little guy.

I love this picture! 

He was looking up at the Christmas lights.

And, in this one, it looks like he is ready to take on the world!

Isn't he a dollbaby?

An aunt has the right to brag, you know.

To God be all glory for the amazing gift of little Eli!

He is our symbol of hope, in the midst of so much darkness and pain.

We suffered deep, deep losses this year, but God sent a precious angel to earth to show us that life must go on, in spite of all.

It sort of reminds me of the year 2000, in some ways.
God took my dear Dad to Heaven in June, but He sent us precious Zachary in December.

It's hard to say this, but "the LORD gave, and the LORD hath taken away; blessed be the name of the LORD."
Job 1:21

To each of you faithful, precious readers and friends, I say,
Happy New Year!
May God bless each of you in a special way every, single day of 2018.

I end this final post of 2017 with five of the songs that have helped sustain me countless times.
They truly express how I feel right now.

I'll Praise You In This Storm - Casting Crowns

Even If - Mercy Me

Shoulders - For King and Country

I Will Trust In You - Lauren Daigle

Thy Will - Hillary Scott

A Sad, Sad Good-bye & Reminder of Special Fasting & Prayer Day ~ 12-27-2017

"So the people...believed God, and proclaimed a fast, and put on sackcloth, from the greatest of them even to the least of them."
Jonah 3:5
(KJV)

I started writing this post days ago, and my, how things have changed since I began writing it.
My heart is so overwhelmed that I can barely finish it.

Before I get into the rest of this post, I want to say that today is dear Zach's birthday!
Seventeen years ago, at 10:32 am, our dear miracle baby made his grand entrance into this world,
bringing with him the sweetest bursts of sunshine ever to enter our lives.
Unbelievable to see how quickly the years have flown, and I cannot believe our "baby" is now 17.
Being the one he calls, "Mama", is truly one of the greatest, most precious joys, gifts, and blessings I have ever been given.
I cherish every, single moment with this dear boy, and I will never cease praising God for allowing Kevin and me to be his parents.

Today, we were eating at one of Zach's favorite restaurants and enjoying the special treat of getting to go there on such a special occasion, when Kevin's cell phone rang.
It was my nephew, Mark.
I knew when I picked up the phone that something was tragically wrong.
The flood of tears and each near-unintelligible word that followed felt like an individual dart shot straight into my heart.
I could NOT believe what I was hearing.
"We lost him, Aunt Cheryl", I finally deciphered Mark's words between sobs.
"What do you mean, Buddy?" I did NOT want to even imagine I had heard him right.
"He's gone."

Yes, dear friends.
The one you have prayed for so earnestly and for whom I called the day of fasting and prayer for tomorrow, 12/27, is now resting in the arms of Jesus.
My tears flow like a river, as I try to see the screen while typing these words.
LD left this world this morning at around the same time dear Zach entered it 17 years ago today.

I feel numb.
I won't say I come close to understanding God's plan.
This is not the way this was supposed to turn not...not even close....in my way of thinking and realm of thoughts.
But, who am I?
God's thoughts are so far above mine that the two do not, nor can they ever, be reconciled.

After I got the word out about the day of fasting and prayer, responses began to flow into our email.
Responses from people who are hurting.
Who have loved ones who are hurting.
Who need a miracle.
Just like LD.

Tomorrow, is the day we set aside to call for a time of collective fasting and earnest prayer on behalf of my brother-in-law, LD, who has been battling stage 4 lung cancer.
I originally thought this time of intercession was to be set aside, just for LD.

God, obviously knew all along, that by 12/27/17, LD would no longer need our prayers.
He knew that there are others who would need this special time that is set aside...
a time to pray and seek God's face with the intense earnestness it takes to move Him on His throne.

Jesus said, "This kind goeth not out by by prayer and fasting."  Matthew 17:21  

There are situations in this life that require a greater level of intercession and desperation before God, such as was the case in LD's situation, and many others.  

Fasting does not mean that you have to go without eating for a full day.  

Many people have health issues that prohibit this.  

Even the sacrifice of one meal or the setting aside of something for the sake of obedience accelerates the power of prayer.

Now, instead of praying for my dear brother-in-law, who has just today received his perfect healing in Heaven, will you please, please pray for my sister, Debbie, and my nephew, Mark?
In the moments you would have mentioned his name, will you please kindly mention theirs?
Their grief is unbearable.
All of our hearts are shattered.
We had so much faith to believe things would turn out the way we wanted them to.
To be honest, we are just consumed with grief...we cannot understand.
We all prayed SO hard, and dear LD had SO much faith.
We all just knew this would turn out differently, and we all feel like we were just slapped in the face and punched in the gut.
God sent the healing we asked for...just not in the way we had hoped.

In addition to praying for my family tomorrow, will you also please pray for the others who have sent prayer requests that would so appreciate being included in this special time of prayer and fasting?

I list the prayer requests below, in the order they came to me.

• Please pray for fellow-blogger, Betsy Queen's, brother-in-law, Mike.  I share her words here.  "He has three cancerous tumors in his lungs. The anti-rejection medicine he has to take from his liver transplant causes these cancerous tumors. It’s truly a “pick your own poison” situation he’s in. Without the medication, his body will reject the liver. With the medication he gets cancer. He has treatments three times a week at the hospital, and it’s very draining for him and my sister. It’s been a years long battle so far and it is draining them."

• Please pray for fellow-blogger, Mary Zatkalik, who recently had to have both knees replaced and is now going through a painful, difficult recovery.  UPDATE:  12/27/2017 @10:01 PM - Please also pray for God to heal a chest cold that Mary is suffering from.

• Kevin's Aunt Vaida Waid is very ill, battling lung cancer for the 2nd time.  (You may remember me mentioning prayer for her last summer, when I spoke of her illness in this post.)  The type of chemo they are giving her this time around has wreaked havoc on her body, and she is being forced to decline further treatment.  Please pray for her healing.

• A heartbroken mother shared this request "for a son in the bonds of alcoholism to be delivered.  That the Lord would remove the desire to drink from him, and that He would give him the courage to take the steps necessary to stop drinking and the strength to see it through.”

• Doug and Rose, both stand in need of physical healing, they long to draw closer to the Lord and to put Him first in their lives, and their home needs a new roof.

• Please pray for fellow-blogger, Bettie G., who suffers terribly from physical afflictions and has just undergone a change in medical treatment.  She shared this, "Would you pray that this new medication will not cause side effects while we have family gatherings here? I want to be "present" and full of the Holy Spirit's grace during our visits."

• Please pray for Louise, who is suffering from bone cancer and has been sent home from the hospital with little hope.  UPDATE:  12/27/2017 @ 9:15 PM - I just got word that Louise just passed away.  Please pray for this dear, grieving family.

• Please pray for Minnie, who has suffered a stroke and is not doing well.

• Please pray for the parents and family of 10 month old, Eden, who recently died after suffering a rare brain aneurysm.

• Please pray for a miracle for a mother and her 4 children who are in dire circumstances and sent this request for prayer, "My children and I ask for financial security, safety, and God to do miracles for us.  There is so much we need. I ask for miracles to never be apart from my children."

• Please pray for a wife who sent this prayer request for her husband, "Would you uphold my dear beloved - we’ve been married for 39 years and I’ve been praying for his salvation for 37 1/2 yrs.  Would you pray that the Holy Spirit would continue to work on his heart and woo him to Jesus.  Our lives and days grow shorter, and I desire to share my Jesus with him."

• Please pray for Bronda Boley, who is heavily burdened and sent this request, "There are so many things on my heart right now..."  Sometimes, we cannot even put into words what we need.  So thankful to know that Jesus knows!

• Please pray for a two-year old with respiratory distress.

• Please pray for Scot, a young man who is battling stage 4 cancer.

• Please pray for a brother-in-law, named Roy, who is in hospice "who wants to go to heaven--"home".

• Please pray for Lemeno Pearsall, who is suffering from pneumonia and congestive heart failure.  Please pray for her daughter, MG, who has to travel a long distance to be with her.  Pray for safe travel and peace of mind and heart.

• Please pray for 38 year old, Monica Brown, who is suffering from a rare, cancerous blood disorder.  She has been on life support for a month and is not doing well.

• Please pray for a teenage boy named Parker.

• Please pray for fellow-blogger, Kitty, and for healing hearts in her family.

• Several have silent prayer requests that they would prefer to keep private.  Please cover all of these with a blanket of intercession tomorrow, along with the names you are mentioning, if you will, dear friends.  God knows who needs your prayers, and He sees and knows every individual heartache....yours, included.  He hears and understands the words the heart speaks.

Your prayers and the sacrifice you are making to join in this fast mean more to me than I could ever express in mere words.

I pray that God will richly and abundantly bless and reward each one of you, 

and may He work out your own personal prayer requests and meet every need in your lives at this time.

"Now unto Him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us..."

Ephesians 3:20

"And Jesus answering saith unto them, Have faith in God."

Mark 11:22

Merry Christmas 2017!!

"For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord."

Luke 2:11

(KJV)

And, just a reminder....

God bless each one of you in a very special way this wonderful Christmas Day!!

Upcoming Day of Fasting and Prayer

"Howbeit this kind goeth not out but by prayer and fasting."

Matthew 17:21

(KJV)

I know many of you are praying for my brother-in-law, LD, who is battling stage 4 lung cancer.

His condition continues to worsen, and the doctors cannot get the bleeding to stop.

As I spoke with my sister, Debbie, last night, she asked if I would call for a day of special prayer and fasting for LD.

I know this is a very busy time for all of us, there is a lot of eating that accompanies this festive and wonderful time of year, and it would be very difficult to fast before Christmas.

But, many times, after Christmas, we all feel the need of taking a break from food and allowing a fast to cleanse the extra food indulgence from our bodies.

So I decided to set the date for the fast for Wednesday, 12/27/2017.

I know many of you are battling your own physical issues, marital distresses, emotional wounds, financial woes, and have a multitude of other mountains in your path.

As I prepared this blog post, I felt led to open this up to ALL of you.

Though I am privy to some of your personal needs, I would never think of adding your name or situation to the list, without your individual consent and permission.

Your privacy is precious and important to me, and when someone trusts me enough to bestow the gift of their confidence, I do not take that trust lightly, nor do I abuse it.

I hold the prayer requests you share with me very close and dear to my heart, 

and I pray earnestly and privately for you.

If you would like to add a prayer request to be included in this universal, collective fast,

please feel free to let me know.

If your need is of a private nature or you prefer to communicate by email, you can contact me by scrolling down the right sidebar to the "About" section, clicking on my name located right next to my picture, then clicking on "Email" on the page that comes up next.

Or, you are more than welcome to leave a comment, sharing the prayer request there.

Perhaps, you want a name included, but not the particulars of your need, or you may want the details included, without a name.

God sees and knows all, and He is ever mindful of our individual needs.

Just let me know what information you want shared publicly, and I will respect your privacy and honor your wishes.

In the meantime, we would SO appreciate your continued prayers for LD,

as through human eyes, things do not look good for him.

It surely takes a concentrated effort to keep looking through the eyes of faith.

"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen."

Hebrews 11:1

"For we walk by faith, not by sight..."

2 Corinthians 5:7

Lord willing, I will post the prayer requests to be prayed for around midnight of 12/26/2017,
so everyone will know who to pray for, specifically, in addition to praying for LD.

God bless you all this Christmas season!

Please Pray, Dear Friends! Update on LD

"Dear brothers and sisters, pray for us."

I Thessalonians 5:25

(NLT)

My family and I are so very thankful to you for every prayer you have prayed for us.

Sometimes, I feel so hesitant to ask yet once again for more prayer,

but, at my family's request, that is exactly what I need to do tonight.

As you know, my brother-in-law, LD, was recently diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer, 

and has also been battling double pneumonia.

He had to be taken to the Emergency Room a couple of days ago,

due to vomiting blood and blood clots.

After he was admitted, he began to suffer from severe hemorrhaging,

and a trauma team had to be called in to get it stopped.

After that crisis was over, the doctors found that the tumor in his lung is wrapped 

around his pulmonary artery, and it is inoperable.

He was told to get his affairs in order.

The news could not have been worse, and, needless to say, my sister, nephew,

other family members, and I are completely devastated.

LD is a man of faith who has been in the ministry for many years, and he is a firm believer in God's power to heal.

I, myself, have witnessed his prayers for other people and have watched how God has come on the scene and answered, time after time.

We all know that what man deems impossible is an easy task for God.

It only takes a mustard-seed-sized amount of faith to move a mountain.

Regardless what doctors say, I believe God is able to do exceeding abundantly above all we can ask or even think.

He is the Great Physician, and Jesus suffered those awful stripes upon His body for our healing.

Even after the devastating news, I come to you, once again, asking you to please pray for LD's healing.

I ask you to please pray for my sister, Debbie, and my nephew, Mark, as they are in much need of your prayers at this time.

I also ask for prayer for the rest of us who care deeply for LD.

Our hearts are utterly broken.

These are two of LD's favorite songs, and I want to include them here, in honor of him.
The tears flow, as I remember the many, many times he has sat in our living room,
playing his guitar, and singing these songs.
After many past physical afflictions, the first song below has become his "signature" song.
I never, ever hear it that I don't think of him.


I Can't Even Walk Without You Holding My Hand - Charles Johnson & The Revivers


I Know A Man Who Can - George Jones

You will never know how much we appreciate you and your past and continued prayers.

God bless you abundantly for helping to carry our burdens.

Thank you from the bottom of my grateful heart.

Christmas Greetings from BABY ELI ~ A "Jesus Loves You!" Book Review ~ Update on LD

"I will praise Thee: for Thou hast heard me, and art become my salvation."
Psalm 118:21
(KJV)

As many of you know, we started out the year 2017 with some very troubling news.
My niece, Kristen, who was expecting a baby, had a blood clot that had traveled into her lung,
and she had collapsed at the Emergency Room.
What followed were many months of me asking you, dear friends, to lift her and her little unborn baby in prayer.
You were faithful to pray.
And, GOD!
He was faithful to answer in such a miraculous way.

The result ended up being one of the major highlights of the year, when on July 5th, one super-special little man, named Eli, made his grand entrance into our family and lives.

(You can see his very first picture and read about that happy day, by clicking HERE.)
It is hard to believe that over five months have passed since little Eli's arrival,
and, now, he is enjoying his very first Christmas!

Isn't he just a little doll?
I keep saying he just gets cuter by the day!
Oh, friends!
We are SO grateful to God for this precious little bundle of joy,
and each time I think of him, I am constantly reminded of the amazing miracle God performed,
in answer to all of our prayers.

Things could have turned out so differently, and I never, ever take what God did for us for granted.
He is such a dear baby, and oh, the brightness he brings into this world!

Today, he decided he would try to get out of his chair, while no one was looking!

(Or so, he thought...)

This is what happened when he realized he was caught red-handed!!!!

Oh, my word!
That face!!
He is downright hilarious and has such a personality!!!
What a dollbaby!
We will never cease praising God for the way He intervened on behalf of this little guy and his Mommy.
She still has some residual health concerns, but, thankfully, for the most part, all is well, praise God!
He is so faithful!!

********************************************************

I've never done book reviews on this blog in the past, but when someone reached out to me recently and asked if I would review a book called, "Jesus Loves You!", I couldn't refuse.

Any way that I can spread the message of His love...well, that is a-okay with me!

So, I got the book in the mail, and I just had a chance to sit down and read it tonight.

This is my honest review, and I received no compensation.

At first glance, I thought this book would be geared towards very young children and could be used as an introduction to who Jesus is and His love for them.

However, when I got into the reading of the book, I realized that the writer refers to events that happen much later in life and are more of a mature nature.

There are references to asking a girl to dance, a "first romantic kiss", a painful relationship break-up, a "co-worker who you thought was totally cute", and marriage to "that cute co-worker".

The author also refers to aging parents.

My personal opinion is that the book may not be age-appropriate for small children.

Small children cannot relate to the seasons of adolescence, adulthood, and old age,

and I don't think they would, at that point, find the content relevant.

The intention of the message of the book is that Jesus loves us so much, and He remains with us all throughout life.

Through the good times, the bad times, and all times in between, He is there,

steadfast and unmovable.

The book is written in a very basic way, and I think young children could understand the words, but the intended message would definitely be best received by those who have experienced life, firsthand, and who have already walked through the stages mentioned.

The illustrations are simplistic, but colorful, bright, and attractive.

It is 13 pages long and is a quick read.

All in all, I would most recommend this book to older teenagers and adults who are learning about Jesus for the first time.

The book is published by Lighthouse Christian Publishing and can be purchased HERE.

*****************************************************

I also wanted to share an update on my brother-in-law, LD, who is battling stage 4 lung cancer.

He has had pneumonia for an extended period of time, and is still in much need of prayer, 

as he continues more radiation treatments and will soon start chemotherapy.

We truly appreciate all of the prayers you have prayed on his behalf, and we are still believing God to send the miracle he needs.

Thank you so much for continuing to pray for him!

UPDATE AT 6:25 PM:

LD is at the emergency room in very serious condition.

PLEASE PRAY!!

*********************************************************

In closing, I wanted to share one of my new favorite Christmas songs.

I think this is the first year I remember hearing this song, and oh, my, as I listened to the choir singing it at church the other night, I was so moved.

The message just makes me cry.

It is so beautiful.

I hope you can listen to this version by "4 Him" I found on youtube.

A Strange Way To Save The World - 4 Him

I hope all of you are enjoying this wonderful Christmas season!!
I love and appreciate each one of you dear readers, and I am praying for each one of you as I type these words.
Merry Christmas!!!

When Christmas Isn't Merry

"Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies, and the God of all comfort; Who comforteth us in all our tribulation, that we may be able to comfort them which are in any trouble, by the comfort wherewith we ourselves are comforted of God."
2 Corinthians 1:3,4
(KJV)

It's no secret that I absolutely love Christmas.

And, I would say that a big percentage of the people reading this would, without hesitation,

give the answer of "Christmas", if they were asked to name their favorite holiday.

It is beginning to look a lot like Christmas, both in our beloved little town,

and inside our home.

The Nativity scene is out,

the precious-to-us and still-unscathed-by-so-many-years'-use tree we bought our very first married Christmas together 29 years ago is up and twinkling,

and the stockings are hung with care.

Zach is SO excited for Christmas and counts down the days on this little chalkboard.

There is joy in our hearts in abundance this Christmas season...yes...

but, there are also a lot of other emotions and feelings that pervade.

Christmas truly is the most wonderful time of the year, in my opinion,

but Christmas does not remove or erase real life.

It doesn't magically transport the heart to a place where there is no grief,

no tears, no pain, and no heartache.

On this earth, there is no such place, and that is reality.

Only Heaven will bring such blessed perfection.

"And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away."

Revelation 21:4

Jesus said, 

"These things I have spoken unto you, that in Me ye might have peace. 

In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world."

John 16:33

Life in this world is not perfect.

Far from it.

As a year begins to wind down, I always get sentimental
(I know what you're thinking...just when is she not that way?😂)
and become reflective.

My thoughts go deep, and I look back over the closing year and sort of come up with a mental recap.

As I do that this year, I'm telling you, it has been ONE. HARD. YEAR.

The word we chose, as a family, for 2017 is PEACE.

In light of that fact, if I look back and measure the year based on peaceful circumstances,

I would rate it a big zero.

Peaceful circumstances?

NOT hardly.

That is what I was hoping for when we felt led to choose that word as our "word of the year".

God had other plans.

Whew.

Just thinking back on all that has happened, and all that is still happening at this very moment,

makes me weary-beyond-words, heart-wrenched, and just plain mentally and physically exhausted.

NOT that I am complaining.
I promise, I am not.
Because in the midst of loss, grief, physical affliction, mental anguish, and an ongoing fight with severe anxiety, amongst other things, I am GRATEFUL.
From the bottom of my heart.
This year has been far from externally-peaceful, but it has brought more blessings than we could ever count.
God has been there....through it all.
He has come on the scene for us time after time after time, and I say,
all glory to Him for His faithfulness, for His unfailing love, and His never-ending mercies to my family and me.
Praise His holy name from the depths of my inmost soul.
I have never loved Him more.

In our year of the word, "PEACE", I have learned a new appreciation for the quote,

"Sometimes God calms the storm; sometimes He calms His child."

There has been a whole lot more of "calming His child" than His "calming the storm" this year.

Sometimes, peace is not about the absence of life storms.
Sometimes, peace is not about the external...at all.
Sometimes, peace is all about the internal work God does in us, in spite of all that is happening around us.

Christmas time is nearing, yet real life remains...for you...for me...for all of us.
The wheels of human condition do not screech to a halt at Christmas.

Brokenness continues.
Grief remains raw.
Woeful hearts bleed.
Impending loss hovers and pulls a cloud over present circumstances.
Fear and uncertainty are still hard at work and ever on the job.
Illness invades the best-laid plans.
Bodies ache.
Marital tensions rip and tear, as the sound of good-bye echoes ahead of ever being spoken.
Wounds, betrayal, disappointment, and shattered dreams haunt, overtake waking thoughts.
Empty seats at family gatherings serve as stark reminders of how much we've lost.
Loneliness magnifies as memories of Christmases past wash over grieving souls.
Dread overwhelms as we look around and wonder whose seat will be empty next.
Depression is formidable...even now.

Life goes on, yes, even at Christmas.
Those who are struggling often find their pain even intensifies during this time of year.
It can feel like a personal attack when it seems that everyone around you is wrapped in a blanket of joy, as you stand outside the warmth on the sidelines shivering from a cold, sad, deep void.

The truth is, everyone suffers, and in spite of all of the merriment of this blessed time of year,
every heart continues to bear its own sorrow.

And, this, my friend, is why Jesus came!
Not to make life one long, incessant bed of ease.
Not to remove every thorn from our path.
Not to promise that we would never hurt.
But, He came...He condescended to be born into a human body...just like us...
so He could FEEL our pain.
So, He could experience what it means to be one of us...
to walk in the shoes of human condition...squalid, wretched, needy parts included.
To not just hear about what we're like, watching from Heaven afar,
imagining what it would be like to go through the things we do,
but to live out the full gamut of life as we know it.
He breathed it all...the entire scope of what sin has done to our fallen world.
He didn't insist upon being born in the palatial castle He deserved,
as a full-grown Prince of Peace whose every wish was granted to the full.
That night, so long ago, in that precious spot, under that brightly shining star,
Jesus, our Lord and Savior chose to came into this world the same, exact way you and I did...
through the anguished birth pangs of His mother, Mary.
He chose to start out the same way you and I did, not to stay frozen in that manger, but to grow one day at a time, so He could live and breathe the complete capacity of life on earth.
He, the Bread of Life, chose to depend upon someone else for His daily bread.
He, the Maker of All, chose to have to learn how to make things at the feet of His earthly father, Joseph.
He, the Word made flesh, chose to need to be taught how to speak, read, and write.
He, the One who "did no sin, neither was guile found in His mouth" (I Peter 2:22), chose to become sin and bear the full guilt and punishment for every, single thing you and I have ever done or will ever do wrong.

"For He hath made Him to be sin for us, who knew no sin; that we might be made the righteousness of God in Him."
2 Corinthians 5:21

Regardless what you are going through this Christmas, may I just take this opportunity to remind you that Jesus came.
I know you know that.
May I add two words to the end of that?
Jesus came for you.
He understands.
He truly gets all you are going through...because there is nothing you are facing right now that He cannot relate to on the most personal, intimate level possible.
In some form or another, He has felt every human emotion known to man.

Many years after that starlit night in Bethlehem, He said this,
"Come unto Me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
Take My yoke upon you, and learn of Me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light."

Matthew 11:28-30

This is why He came.

To do the heavy lifting.

To bear our unbearable sins.

To give us rest.

To offer an easier yoke.

Trying to navigate through this beyond-difficult life without being "yoked" to Christ adds so much unnecessary, extra strain and toil.

We are going to have problems, whether we choose to yoke to Him or not.

Taking His yoke upon us and allowing Him to take the hardest, weightiest end of the load brings blessed relief.

This Christmas, I pray that you experience Jesus, the reason for the season, in a whole new way.

My hope is that He becomes vividly real to you, that as you view manger scenes and starlit nights, 

you are able to give your all to Him...the good, the bad, the ugly, the unmentionable.

That you can release your heaviness to Him, and sense the reality that He is absolutely on your team,

He is fighting for you, and He loves you with an everlasting love.

Though life is hard and situations are sometimes overwhelming,

He is here.

God with us.

Emmanuel.

Our Savior forever.

Softly and Tenderly - Alan Jackson

Somebody's Praying You Through

"Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed.
The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much."

James 5:16

(KJV)

I hope everyone reading this had a wonderful Thanksgiving Day!

I am so grateful to our dear and loving Lord for all of His many blessings.

He is a faithful God Who is absolutely worthy of our praise.

There is no method more effective in putting satan on the run than to begin praising God,

personally thanking Him for all He has done, all He is doing, and all He is going to do for us.

God dwells where praises flow.

Jesus came to offer an amazing exchange to those who are depressed.

As He taught in the synagogue one day, (recorded in Luke 4:16-21), He read aloud these words,

"The Spirit of the Lord GOD is upon Me; because the LORD hath anointed Me to preach good tidings unto the meek; He hath sent Me to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to them that are bound;

To proclaim the acceptable year of the LORD, and the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all that mourn; To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the LORD, that he might be glorified."

Isaiah 61:1-3

He told the worshipers that this Scripture was fulfilled that day, in their ears.

Jesus came to give the garment of praise in exchange for "the spirit of heaviness".

How many of you have ever experienced a heavy spirit?

Who among us has not experienced it?

I grew up in a household that was often overshadowed by "the spirit of heaviness".

Both of my dear parents struggled with depression, and it was a very real part of our daily lives.

I used to become so frustrated when I would find them crying.

One particular memory stands out more than others.

Mom, Dad, and I used to clean houses, apartments, and duplexes in the evenings after Dad got off work and I got home from school.

It was hard work, to say the least, and, now that I am older, I wonder how my dear Daddy was able to hold up to such, especially after working hard all day long.

It was during one such evening that I came upon him, working alone in a bathroom of the unit we were cleaning.

What I saw made me stop in my tracks and nearly fall to pieces.

In the midst of his cleaning, Dad had taken a pause, and he was crying, like his heart was broken.

Even though I pressed him hard to find out the cause for his tears, I never did totally get to the bottom of the reason for his distress, and I remember the deep sadness I felt, as I finally walked away from him, confused, afraid, and insecure.

I learned early on that the only refuge I could turn to in times of such distress was to go to my room and kneel beside my bed and pour out my little-girl heart straight into the arms of my Savior.

More times than I can count, I prayed Mom and Dad through.

The weight of feeling that responsibility was overwhelming and heavy for a child to carry.

But, carry it, I did.

While it left deep emotional scars, I don't regret it.

On the flip side, the times my dear parents prayed me through are also beyond counting.

I will probably never know how many of those tears were shed on my behalf,

as they prayed for me, my future, my health, and my spiritual well-being.

How I miss their prayers, now that both Mom and Dad are gone!

I take comfort in Revelation 14:13,

"Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord from henceforth: Yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labors; and their works do follow them."

I love the part that says, "their works do follow them".

I choose to believe that all of the prayers Mom and Dad prayed for and over me throughout life are still coming up before the ears of God, and He is still answering those prayers.

I just really, truly believe this is true.

Knowing this, makes me see, all the more, how important it is that I am faithful to pray for our own dear son and to intercede on his behalf.

In Jesus' name, may Zach's days be long upon the earth, and may the answers to the many prayers Kevin and I faithfully pray for and over him follow him all the days of his life.

How about you?

Do you see the results of prayers that have been prayed over you throughout life?

Has someone been faithful to pray you through the storms and trials you have faced?

And, you...do you feel that same sense of responsibility to pray someone else through?

Who is in your prayer list?

Who is depending upon you to pray them through?

How I thank God for praying parents, a praying husband, a praying son, praying siblings,

and all of the other faithful friends, loved ones, and prayer warriors in my life who faithfully and consistently pray me through the turbulent times and hard places.

I know many of you, dear readers, have been so kind to pray for my family and me so many, many times.

I am so very grateful to each one of you, and I want you to know I am here to do the same for you.

Many of you are included in my regular prayer times with the Lord.

I call your names, individually, often, and with a sincere heart.

I am praying now, as I type these words, for the person behind every, single set of eyes who reads them.

I don't know exactly what many of you are going through.

I don't even know who most of you are.

Every now and then, I take a peek at the stats on my blog, and I wonder just who all it is who "clicks" on this site and takes the time to read what God has placed upon my heart.

I don't really need to know who all visits here or to be privy to the details of your inward, unique struggles, because, you and I, we have the same Father in Heaven, and He sees and knows all.

When I pray for you, whether you are someone I know personally or through the blog or someone I have never communicated with or even heard of, God hears...just as He hears you every time you pray.

He cares about you, my friend.
He loves you with an unconditional love.

And, the greatest thing is this.
Whether or not anyone else is faithful to pray for you, there is always, always, always someOne in your corner, who is faithfully praying you through the circumstances and trials in your life.

"We have such an high priest, who is set on the right hand of the throne of the Majesty in the heavens; a minister of the sanctuary, and of the true tabernacle, which the Lord pitched, and not man."

Hebrews 8:1,2

"It is Christ that died, yea rather, that is risen again, who is even at the right hand of God, who also maketh intercession for us."
Romans 8:34

Can you imagine?
Jesus Christ, our Savior and Advocate, is seated at the right hand of His Father, and He, Himself, is praying for you...and for me!
To think that He is that interested in the details of our lives,
to know that He sees, He knows, He cares,
and He prays and intercedes to His Father on our behalf makes me realize how very blessed and loved and cared for we truly are.

You may feel alone...unprayed for...like you haven't a friend in the world.
Forsaken.
Abandoned by God.
Forgotten and cast aside.

The truth is, you are none of these.
Regardless.
Jesus is ever on the job.
He is always alert and in tune with your needs.
He never takes His eyes off you, and He never sleeps.

"I lift up my eyes to the mountains-- where does my help come from?

My help comes from the LORD, the Maker of heaven and earth.

He will not let your foot slip-- He who watches over you will not slumber..."
Psalm 121:1-3

You are worth more to Him than you will ever be able to comprehend.
Don't ever forget it!

"Are not five sparrows sold for two farthings, and not one of them is forgotten before God?

But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows."

Luke 12:6,7

I became familiar with this song during the time of one of Mom's extended stays in a nursing home that was located about 30 miles from our home.

Little Zach and I would travel the distance every, single day to be with her, and in the midst of the weariness, stress, worry, and upheaval, I remember listening to this song in the car and finding so much comfort in its words.

I hope it blesses you, too.

Somebody's Praying Me Through - Allen Asbury

And, this one...oh, my, it is a precious song sung by my favorite singer of all time.

Somebody's Praying - Ricky Skaggs

We all carry a cross, and we need one another's prayers.
In closing, I hope you enjoy the words of this song, too.
May we always remember to pray for one another and lift each other's needs to the throne of our Father.

"Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."
Galatians 6:2

While you are praying, my family and I would so appreciate your continued prayers for my brother-in-law, LD, who is battling stage 4 lung cancer.

My prayer for you today is that God will bless you and meet any needs you have at this time, also.

I'll Pray For You - The Whisnants

Happy Thanksliving!, and A Speech from My Christmas Soapbox

"In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

I Thessalonians 5:18
(KJV)

~ Thanksliving ~
living a life of continual giving of thanks to God for our many blessings...

not just on the 4th Thursday of November each year,

but every, single day we are given to live.

Thanksliving is not always easy to do.

Hard times will come.

Days will sometimes be long.

Nights even longer.

But, regardless, God is still God, and He is good, in spite of trials that He allows to come our way.

How I love this time of year!
The other morning, I took some pictures, and then, the other day, as we were driving down the interstate, Zach took pictures from the car of the amazing beauty of the mountains all clad with colors that only our amazing God could create.
I wanted to share some of them with you, along with some Bible verses that support a life of continual Thanksliving!
These verses would make great additions to your Massive Scriptural Arsenal.
Feel free to pin away or print them out to memorize and remind you to live thankfully every, single moment of life...not just on Thanksgiving Day each year!

Every year, at about this time, I step up on to my little soapbox about something that is very important to me...the American Family Association's Naughty or Nice List they post before every Christmas on their website.

We were so happy to see that it was posted today!
In our quest to live minimal, more eternity-focused lives we have scaled waaaaay back on not only our Christmas shopping, but our purchasing, period....but we are thrilled to see that the two places we do most of our shopping are both on the "nice" list!
Otherwise, we would have had to make other arrangements, because we refuse to patronize stores who refuse to acknowledge why they see such an increase in their sales every November and December.
Jesus is the reason for the season, and I know there are those of you who contend that Jesus has nothing in the world to do with the madness of this time of year.
I agree with you that the chaos and stress that accompanies Christmas couldn't be more polar opposite to that quiet, peace-filled night so long ago in Bethlehem.
BUT, if you are going to shop and make purchases at this time of year,
wouldn't it line up more with your Christian values to only shop in stores who recognize Christ,
who use the name "Christmas" in their advertising and public displays,
and who are not against His mission?
And, at the risk of offending some of you who are loyal to Target, I will mention one more thing....while I am still up on my little soapbox. ☺
I must express my family's and my extreme disdain for them and our continued resolve to BOYCOTT TARGET.
If you would like to know why, this article will fully explain and will also give you an opportunity to sign a pledge and take a stand for what is right.
How can we, as Christians, hand our hard-earned dollars over to a company who continues to promote such filthy, vile behavior?
The answer is, we can't, and, here in the Smith household, we don't, and we won't!
We are far from being fanatics, but enough is enough!
There are sooooo many competitor stores who do not condone such perversion, and there are plenty of other places to buy our necessaries.
We would do without before we would give Target a cent,
and that is my two-cents' worth.  ☺
Just sayin'...and steppin' off my soapbox now.

Thanks for still loving me and for hearing my heart.
I say everything I say here from a heart filled-to-the-brim-with-love...for God, for His Word and cause, for my family, for my country,
and for you, dear readers.

As you gather together and count your blessings with your loved ones on Thursday,
don't forget to say a special prayer for the brave souls who sacrifice and put their lives on hold day after day, so you and I can live in this beautiful land of the free.
Pray for our President and Vice President,
our dedicated military men and women who are away from their families for our sake,
and our amazing police officers who risk their lives to keep us safe.

We are so very, very blessed...every, single one of us,
and we have so much to thank God for!
May He grant all of you a wonderful Thanksgiving Day!!

Please, if you will, continue to pray for my brother-in-law, LD, who is in the throes of battling stage 4 lung cancer.
My family and I appreciate your prayers SO very much!

Free Fallin' & Update on LD

"But it is good for me to draw near to God: I have put my trust in the Lord GOD, that I may declare all Thy works."
Psalm 73:28
(KJV)

It's amazing how inspiration to write comes to me.
Sometimes, I write from the deepest points of inward pain.
Sometimes, I am crying out to God for a glimmer of hope...some shred of encouragement,
and when I can't find any...anywhere around me...I end up here.
Writing out what my soul needs to hear.

I think if I was given the task of figuring out which 2 Bible characters I am most like,
I would be able to answer real quick, because I already know.
Think of two of the most flawed ones, and you'll know right away, too.
One is Old Testament; one is New.
Both made monumental mess-ups.
Both were redeemed by the grace of God.
Both loved God fiercely with all their heart, soul, and passionate nature,
in spite of their bend towards doing the wrong thing.

Any guesses who they might be yet?

One's name begins with a "D"; one begins with a "P".
Both plunged into forbidden territory, in spite of knowing better,
and ended up swallowed in regret and deep remorse and depression,
but, at the end of the day, one was called "a man after God's own heart" (Acts 13:22),
and the other's name was changed to a name that literally means "rock" (John 1:42).

Okay, so, you probably know the answer is David and Peter.
One of the things I can relate most to David about is the fact that when he was distressed and depressed, "David encouraged himself in the LORD his God." I Samuel 30:6.
Do you know what I think?
I think it was during these times that David wrote most of the book of Psalms.
I think when David was in the pits of despair, he looked around and could find no outward solace,
and, in those anguished moments, he cried out from the depths of his soul to God,
and he wrote those feelings down.
And, now, you and I can turn to his beautiful, poetic, heartwrenched words,
and we can find an instant connection to a kindred spirit who refused to give up in some of the hardest, most tormenting times of life.

So, this post is coming from my heart to yours...from a moment of particular anguish of soul,
during one of those times when I need something to cling to...to hold on to...something that will steady my unstable, upturned emotions.
God led me here.
To search, as I type.
How often He has given me the answers I crave in just this way!

This morning, He is still attempting to teach me what it means to trust.
Remember that?
Yes, I have been telling you that God is teaching my family and me about trust...
for a very long time now.
In fact, it was even our "word of the year" for 2016!
Yes, I said God is "still attempting to teach"...not because He doesn't know how to teach,
but because I don't seem to know how to learn what He is trying to get across to me.

I worry more than anyone I know.
It is tormenting.
I worry so much that my dear Dad nicknamed me "WW".
Any guesses what that stands for?
If you guessed "worry wart", you got it right.
Not the most attractive thing to be dubbed, for sure.
Dad used to get a kick out of the fact that when he and Mom would leave our house late at night, after a visit in our home, I would fret and worry and imagine all sorts of horrors, until I heard the phone ring, and their voice was on the other end telling me they were home safe.
I think Mom and Dad and me reversed roles shortly after I was born,
because it seemed to be me who did most of the worrying from as far back as I can remember.

It is no wonder I was diagnosed with an ulcer, presumed at or near the bleeding stage, earlier this year.
And, you know what?
That makes me downright angry.
Because I do not want to be this way.
Truly, I don't.
I have been living for Jesus for over 40 years now.
And, I still don't trust Him.
I am so ashamed of that.
I am so sorry when I think of how that must make Him feel.
After all, His track record is impeccable.
He has never broken a promise to me.
He has never failed.
There has never been a moment in my chaotic, turbulent life that He has not been there...
with me...faithful, stalwart.

Stalwart:
loyal, especially for a long time; able to be trusted

So, why?
Why am I so suspicious of Him?
Why can't I believe what He has told me time after time?
Why do I doubt?
Why do I question His motives?
Why am I always looking for one that is ulterior?

This morning, I fight yet another round in the ring with the opponent that has dealt the most TKO blows to date and most often left me broken, bleeding, and lifeless, face-down on the canvas.
He is ugly.
Monstrous.
Grotesque.
Evil to the core.
Mean-spirited.
Ruthless.
He does not fight fair.
All boxing rules are left outside the ring when he steps in.
When I see it's him who has stepped into the ring opposite me, I cringe, cower, run to the nearest corner post, grab onto the rope with both hands, close my eyes,
and I wait....heart pounding so loud, I can hear it inside my head.
He is my Goliath.
My nemesis.
I feel the vibration all the way from the rope inside my tightly-clenched fists to the canvas beneath my trembling feet, every time he takes a thunderous step in my direction.
All the way, he shouts terror, spews venomous slurs, and laughs this hideous, heinous shriek that literally makes my skin crawl and hair stand on end.
He knows he's landed me on my face before.
He remembers every, single round we've ever fought.
He knows my weak spots...all too well.
He couldn't be more gleeful or confident of his win.
I feel my body tense, as his mammoth frame stands over me.
His hot, vile breath falls on the top of my head and trails down the back of my bent neck.
I brace myself as continual pounding of jabs below the belt start coming...
over and over, relentless, unceasing, unfair, far outside the boundary of what is "legal".
He spits, rabbit punches, headbutts, and breaks every rule in the book.
He is like a shark in the water.
Once he sees or even senses blood, he is fueled with a vicious determination to finish me off.
Once again.
I lay flattened near his hateful feet, as taunts of "victory" bellow from his wicked lips and linger like a lead balloon in the air around us.
Then, he does the unthinkable.
He begins to kick with all his might.
Doesn't he know?
You never, ever kick or hit your opponent when she is down...on the canvas...defeated, at your feet.
But, he doesn't stop...it is never, ever enough...for him.

His name is FEAR.
Ever met him?
Perhaps, you have fought a few rounds with him yourself.
He is the most
Ferocious
Evil
Arrogant
Rival I have ever met.

Worry is driven by fear, and "fear hath torment".  (I John 4:18)

I grew up through high school hearing Tom Petty's music and being familiar with him,
but I was 23 when Kevin's and my favorite Tom Petty song came out in 1989.
I was just thinking of  "Free Fallin'" a few days before we got the news that Tom Petty had died.
That news made both of us sad...deep, down inside.
I just can't believe he's gone...it seems way too soon, makes me feel old and ever more aware of my own mortality and inevitable date with death.

Free Fall

move under the force of gravity only; fall rapidly

As I thought about my trust issues, my many rounds in the ring with FEAR, and how I have such a hard time believing God will take care of me and the ones I love, the thought came to me that I need to just "free fall" into His arms and stop worrying so much.
That I need to make an attempt to overcome my contemptible opponent of fear,
and that the most fool-proof way of doing that is to stop allowing him to bully me.
To just let go of what I FEAR might happen, lay it all down, and lighten my load.
To go "free fallin" straight into the eternal arms of the one who has never let go of me...
not one time throughout my troubled life.
To just jump, cut the cord of worry, and leap, light and free, out into nothing but the assurance that His arms will absolutely catch me.

"The eternal God is thy refuge, and underneath are the everlasting arms."
Deuteronomy 33:27

There is no parachute during a free fall into the arms of God.
No safety net.
No back-up plan.
Just a reckless-abandonment-kind-of-trust.
An Esther-like, "If I perish, I perish" mentality.
A "Que Sera, Sera (Whatever Will Be, Will Be)" sort of attitude.

This morning, as I lay battered, bruised, and barely-spiritually-breathing on the canvas,
feeling the effects of the perpetual kicks from fear, I made a firm decision.
And, don't get me wrong.
I'm not saying it will be our last round.
Oh, he'll be back.
I don't ever pretend this war will end.
But, for this round?
For this battle?
I made up my mind.
Somehow, the precious still, small voice of my Savior drowned out the 10-1 countdown and the obnoxious, deafening, gloats of my opponent, and I heard Him remind me that I CAN win.
That all I have to do is fall back into His open arms....and TRUST.
That He has everything in His control, and nothing in this world can foil His plan for our lives.

I don't know how I mustered the strength or the courage, but I let go.
I took that leap of faith, and I felt myself falling, and at the end of my fall, He was there....
safe, secure, strong.
I felt His perfect love surround me, and all is well.

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casteth out fear..."
I John 4:18

And, do you want to know the most astonishing part?
There was never one thing to worry about, and it turns out, FEAR was all a big figment of my imagination.
He was all smoke and mirrors.
He wasn't real....at all.

Update on LD

LD isn't doing well, my friends, and is still in the hospital.
He is in A-fib, and there is blood in the fluid they draw from around his heart.
He has undergone some radiation treatments, as they are trying to shrink the tumor in his lung,
and there is still one more radiation treatment to go, before they begin chemotherapy.
I want you to know that LD, my sister, Debbie, nephew, Mark, and all other family members appreciate each one of your prayers more than they could ever express.
I keep telling them how many people are praying, and it just lifts their spirits so much.
And, no one could appreciate your faithful prayers any more than I do.
I just thank you from the bottom of my grateful heart.
PLEASE, please keep praying for him and the miracle he needs.

"But Jesus beheld them, and said unto them,
With men this is impossible; but with God all things are possible."
Matthew 19:26

"The LORD is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in Him."
Lamentations 3:24